The infinite wisdom of the key cutter man

The other night I was overwhelmed by the desire to radically change my hair. Cutting it wasn't an option as I've decided to grow it again now, to go with that whole 'I'm a beach hippie' look that I intend to master by the time summer rolls around. But still this inimitable force drove me to do *something* different. So I dyed it bright red. Shocking? Yes. Successful? Not very.


I was just casually strolling down my local village high street yesterday, when I decided to pop into "The Hagley Cobbler" - a place of many wonders, including lightbulbs, shoe re-heeling and key-cutting. I enjoyed this shop so much at Christmas, (when many light bulbs blew, and many extra plugs were needed), that I even sent the key cutter man a card. It read:


Dear Mr Cobblers

Thankyou so much for all my home appliances and accessories over the last few months. Thanks to you, the lights are on, even though quite often nobody is home.

Merry Christmas!

From, that girl who lives up the road, who always makes you laugh!


Well, I walked into the shop again yesterday afternoon, in dire need of another light bulb, no less. The key cutter man (a.k.a. Mr Cobblers) looked up sporting his usual kindly frown, and broke into a grin when he saw me.

"Nice hair." He says, still smiling. "I almost didn't recognise you."
"Yeah, well, I fancied a change." I say.
He laughs a great big belly laugh.
"What?" I ask, suddenly aware that my hair is a slightly unsuccessful shade of red.
"So you finally gave that good for nothing boyfriend of yours his marching orders, then!" He starts chuckling again.

At this point, I am most bemused, because, that is exactly what I did do. Just 2 or 3 weeks ago in fact. In the aftermath I sorted out my wardrobes, chucked out old clothes, (shopped for new clothes), changed my kitchen around, and booked a life changing one-way flight to Thailand.

"How did you know I did that?" I ask the key cutter man. God, am I really that predictable?
Still smiling, he pronounces, "That's what women do. Break up with a boyfriend, change their image."
Oh my god. This man is a genius. I have new-found awe and respect for Mr Cobblers. He will come to be known in history as the wise man who took keys, and gave answers.